Life during pandemic- hypochondriac

It is time for us , Indians to write our daily experiences during the horrific second wave of Covid. Each day has become very scary as the news of departure of our near and dear ones are pouring in daily. It is not about only the dead but also few who are struggling to get recovered. Neither the mornings are pleasant nor the nights are peaceful. This virus is not sparing the old aged, middle aged or the young ones. The stories of the sufferings are causing depression of the mental conditions of the ones who are still not kissed by the dreadful disease.

My pandemic stories are not different from others. I lost my sister in law last week, who died in a Delhi hospital. She couldn’t get an oxygen bed on time and was at home for three days with low oxygen saturation. After getting a call from her family we, at a distance of thousands of kilometers had to take the help of social media – Facebook and Twitter to appeal to the public for an oxygen bed at any hospital in Delhi. Thankfully, many responded and we could arrange a bed for her in a Delhi hospital. Thanks to all those who helped and who shared our tweets. Doctors tried hard to save her life but all in vain asmy sis in law breathed her last while on a ventilator. The first jolt of the virus attack directly hit our hearts.

Meanwhile the messages from the neighbors, friends, relatives who got the viral attack continue to pour in. Every one was seeking help to get a bed/ medicine/ventilator as both my husband and son are in medical profession. Both are nowadays busy attending the calls and helping others while the messages and anxious voices of our kith and kin are shaking us from within. I have started taking extra care to keep my family members safe and as the first precautionary measure , we all stopped going out except the persons who need to be there in duties. Rest are at home with doors and windows closed, no outsider is getting entry to my home. Sometimes the door bell rings for online parcels which are ordered if essential.

While we were coping with the pandemic and practicing isolation ( covid free) at home, came the dreaded news of our closest friend beig on death bed. A doctor by profession, he was passionately treating covid patients at hospital and got kissed by the virus. Little did he realised that how severely he was attacked by the unseen enemy! The phone calls and messages started pouring in, tears rolled out non stop, prayers were on- all the freinds and doctors tried their best , even with plasma therapy, but Raja left us. The bright, young, smiling doctor, who did not earned a single enemy in his life time, said good bye to us. We became numb, no words were left to express the feelings- we realised that the horror is knocking at our door. Life is uncertain but it should not be this cruel! We, the friends will miss Raja for our lifetime. The worst nightmare touched us. Yesterday we had a prayer meeting through zoom to remeber his good deeds (he didnt do any wrong- a noble soul).

The second wave should not have been so harsh, so rude and so cruel!

Wasn’t there a way out to check it by raising alarm?

I lost two of my closest relatives and friend and so did my friends, my colleagues. Everyone I speak to over phone narrates same kind of stories. And then some said there is no place for funeral. people are standing in queue for long long hours to get the funeral over. Whom should we blame?

Now that , I am at home due to lockdown, my daily routine include collecting news on social media, watch TV, watch live shows on FB and Instagram, go through print media to know the severity of the pandemic in India. The horrific news from all over the country is unfolding gradually to make me more scary. However, there are the warnings in Facebook which says not to share negative news that is the news of daily death scores, peoples’ suffering etc. I laugh with the absurdity of the percetion of positivity. The worst is happening, and there are some batting for positivity! Every life is precious for thheir family- if a person die, then its the failure of the whole system. We must accept the fact and truth. People should know the truth to take the precautionary measures. Hiding the facts will not help us to overcome the chaos caused by the pandemic. If I am not scared , I will not take the precaution- so make me scared, keep me at home. It is as simple as that. And moreover. we won’t get all the news happening all over the country- what reaches us is may be the ten percent of the whole.

My feelings are may be going the opposite way that is the negative way as I am getting very worried about the situations arising at every household. The searches for beds, ICUs, oxygen cylinders , medicines as well as the daily requirements to feed the hungry family members are no less than a herculean task for the responsible family members. For me, its quite tough to counsel my family that the time is not for luxury. All of us should become spiritual , praying and demand for the minimum like the good ancient days.

Due to the worrisome condition all around I am becoming hypochondriac- unnecessarily worrying about my health, over concious about body ache, body temperature, cold sensation etc. If it itches somewhere, if its a mild headache or amild stomach ache- my doubt about the enemy peeps up. The mental health is going down in many of us the silence of the lockdown is getting shattered into pieces with sirens of ambulances! There is no bird chiping, no flowers in the garden or no delictable item prepared in the kitchen. No new dresses, no selfies, no pictures posted in social media. As if all are dead – either with the disease or with the fear. We have seen the first wave and its lockdown- but never we were scared as there was treatment, no dearth of medical attention and availabilty of hospitals. This time around, our believes on the system is lost by observing the plights of people who are dying like cats and dogs. There is no idea when the life will return to normal and which condition? Whether all the chairs will be empty or there will some alive to occupy them?

(The feature image is collected from Unsplash)

2 thoughts on “Life during pandemic- hypochondriac

  1. Sorry to hear about your losses…yes the pandemic has jolted everyone….it has affected every human at least psychologically….Only way out is precaution as there is no firm treatment…


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